It's Not Fair

The message at church the other week highlighted the fact that life is UNFAIR. It was a message I absolutely needed to hear. In times of trial I've often been told; "Take heart, God only gives us what he knows we can handle." That statement makes me crazy. It makes me feel like if I were less capable, bad things wouldn't happen to me. Rather than giving hope and encouragement, I begin to feel angry and resentful.

The saying our pastor included in his message, and the one I prefer is:

"You cannot control the circumstances, but you can control how you react to them."

I've said it before, I'm a control freak. Being a mother of two has only increased my yearning for control over my life.
Cheerios MUST be off the floor!
MUST pack nutritious lunch!
MUST bake treats for pre-school class!
Children MUST be polite and well mannered, stimulated but not overly, recipients of all that they need with ALL needs anticipated.
MUST have children clean and well dressed for any type of weather! MUST be prepared for ANYTHING at ANYTIME!
There is NO room for ERROR - EVER!!!!

Being a wife and a mother of two has only revealed my inability to control much of anything! But MY emotions, MY reactions, MY words - THAT - I should be able to control. My behavior, my attitude, my choices, okay - I can control those too. I can plan, I can provide healthy choices, I can introduce positive concepts, I can model positive and healthy behaviors, I can be conscientious of all that I do. But I can't control sickness, disability, the residential real estate market, the behavior of my children, my family, my friends, my neighbor, other people's children, the school district, ALL are out of my control.

I feel relieved. I can do SOMETHING! I can control my own behavior! I can't get the school district to do what I want them to do. I can't take away illness, but I can stay calm, supportive and even faithful when it falls on a loved one. I can't fix tragedies; earth shattering or minor, but I can keep from flying into a tailspin when they occur. Hallelujah! No need to obsess over things that are completely beyond my control! It doesn't have any affect!

Hmm....maybe now my face won't look so darn scrunchy, and I can do something more positive with my time. Maybe a hug for my husband and snuggles for the kids.