Advice evolved

In my 20's, during a period of time where I considered dating a bit of a sport, I used to joke with friends a lot about relationships. My favorite saying at the time was that:

"Communication was the root of all evil"

I know, it is pretty impractical, and is a pretty good indicator of just how superficial many of the relationships I had were. While the "Communication is the root of all evil" strategy was effective for dating a lot of people at one time, and certainly a workable strategy for a person who isn't sure of who she is and where she's going, for my current stage in life, it is certainly a perscription for misunderstandings and frustration.

Obviously, marriage, life experience, and a little frustration cured me of such a flimsy strategy, and I've been giving some thought lately to my current approach. For better or worse, I have become a

"Rip off the band-aid" person. When faced with crises, challenges, or even simple decisions, I'm finding that dealing with what is in front of me in the most effective way possible seems to work out well. It frees me up to enjoy the benefits of good decisions, and quickly deal with the aftermath of bad decisions I've made. We have such limited control over our lives, why not deal with what we can and enjoy our circumstances to the best of our ability? Just an idea for you advice seekers out there, whatever your stage in life, I hope you have a good approach and a lot of enjoyment.

The 30 day wait

This Sunday, my husband and I had the opportunity to have dinner with two couples, one couple was in town for a visit, so we were all able to find a time to break bread together. One of the wives was sharing her strategy for big life decisions, which I thought was pretty great.

Whenever thinking about getting something big that you think you REALLY want, you need to want it for 30 days straight.

Obviously, this strategy doesn't apply to buying a frozen yogurt, but it could be a good one to use when considering whether or not you should open a frozen yogurt shop. This idea of "wanting" for a sustained period of time, would also play into the idea that what you think about manifests itself, so you could be helping yourself towards your goal just by thinking about it for 30 days before actually going for it.

Here are a few other situations where the 30 day wait might be usefully employed:

*Getting a pet
*Changing jobs
*Buying a house
*Having plastic surgery
*Getting a tattoo
*Having sex with a new partner
*Moving
*Going back to school
*Quitting school
*Starting smoking
*Purchasing anything that you will have to save for or pay off later
*Having a baby

I realize that in certain of the situations listed above, thinking about wanting something may simply make you want it more, but I dare you to "want" whatever your something is with as much of a realistic, whole, picture as possible. For example; buying a new car would be wonderful, but consider the financial sacrifices you'll have to make to pay for it.

We are all able to access things at a tremendous pace. I can order a movie from home, shop online, get my dry cleaning picked up and delivered within a miraculously short window. I can download pictures, music, send a text to make a plan - almost instantly. But when making decisions that will cause a more lasting affect on your life, maybe trying out the 30 day wait could be a good idea. If nothing else, it will allow you to invest a little more in your decision, hopefully making you feel better about it in the long run.